faithfulson | Voicemail ~ Mask or Menace

[ She is not pouting! She was just very very wary. It couldn't be helped. ]

I wish you wouldn't call him that.

[ Oh Leia... ]

Calling him anything else won't make it any less true.

[ He let out a soft breath, wanting to remind her that he found out after he took his hand. Leia got the news easy in comparison. ]

I'm sorry, but to call him anything else would be... odd, for me. I'll try not to for you.

It makes me uncomfortable, that's all. I won't call him that but I won't stop you from calling him what you feel is...best for you.

[ She began to move through the house so she could sit outside on the front step, door clicking shut. ]

I'll call him Anakin.

Okay.

[ That was a good step in the right direction. Luke let out a breath, tilting his head in thought. ]

The basics he can teach us. That shouldn't be a problem. As for the rest... I think we both need to figure out what being a Jedi actually means for us, and what to do about that. Neither of us can go back to the way the Jedi used to do things; him for the obvious reasons, and me... because I can't be certain my training wasn't for the soul purpose of killing Vader.

[ He... hated admitting he doubted Ben and Master Yoda that much, but the fact they both hid Vader's true identity from him kept gnawing away at him. ]

He did say something about meditation. [ Goodness knows she could use some of that for practice. ] But I demanded to know why he thought we should trust him. Why he wouldn't take it as an opportunity to lead us down a dark path.

[ Really, what does being a Jedi mean? ]

Keeping the peace, isn't that what being a Jedi is all about? Stopping the wars?

To what end?

[ He let out a breath. ]

The Clone Wars involved an entire army of people bred specifically for war, led by the Jedi. And it was only stopped when the Emperor finally pulled all the strings that he needed to pull to get what he wanted.

There used to be thousands of Jedi... and they couldn't see that coming. Why?

[ Unless they wanted it to come... that was a chilling thought that he immediately discarded. That was just too much. ]

It was one of their own. It had to have been. Someone had to have been working both sides; there's no way one single man, someone like the Emperor, could've done all that in his own.

You never suspect the people you trust the most to betray you. [ Her voice doesn't waver, it's her emotions that do. ]

[ He definitely picked that up. ]

Leia?

[ She... wasn't worried they would betray her, was she? ]

[ She sighed; how do they turn this thing off? ]

Yes, Luke?

...we're not going to turn against you. We've got your back, no matter what; and I know you'd do the same for the rest of us.

[ He's trying to be comforting. ]

[ Does she tell him? What would be the point? Really, how did they turn off the Force and feelings? Get out. ]

You can say that now but...

But nothing.

[ Luke's voice was soft, but insistent. ]

No matter how I feel about the Force, how I feel about what the Empire has done to the galaxy will never change. We'll find a way to stop the Empire and get the Republic re-instated, and we'll do it together; all three of us.

Until then, until we leave this place, we'll stick by each other and look out for each other. No matter what.

Six years ago...there was someone I cared for. Really cared for. He spoke the same as you. If he hadn't died following me out, he would have betrayed me and my family and the entire Rebellion.

I know this is different-- you're different, I can feel that. [ Force connections were a good thing. Sometimes. ] Luke, what if Han does the same thing? [ Leia cut in to continue before he could even protest; she knew he would, they were friends. However... ] Ignore the facts of-- of the future we've been told about, just for this one moment.

I care for Han. I...can't say it's on the same level as... [ Just say his name. Betrayals happen all the time. Loyalty is a hard thing to believe in and find these days. Liar, you care just as deeply for Han. ] Kier--

I just don't want to believe and trust and have it all repeat again. That's all.

Leia...

[ She never told him about this before, and it made him pause. The fact that she ended up trusting Han enough to marry him and have a son was all the more meaningful. ]

[ ...but it still wasn't his responsibility to tell her that. ]

I know this may not mean much right now, but... I can assure you his feelings are genuine.

[ The thing was, Leia hadn't told anyone about Kier or how she'd felt after he'd died. Luke was one of the first to know. ]

You're right, it doesn't. You can't know, Luke. You can't just use the force to feel out other people's emotions. It's not...fair.

[ Feel hers right now; conflict, uncertainty, an anger simmering beneath the surface that was likely more just irritation than anything else. ]

It's... not feeling out emotions. You'll understand, I promise.

[ He definitely could, even with the distance separating them. He seriously felt bad, especially with so much dumped on top of her at once. ]

I can't understand what I don't know.

[ Dammit Han, why haven't you told her yet? Luke let out a desperate, helpless noise. ]

Leia... this isn't something that I can tell you. Please try to understand.

[ She was quiet. For a long moment. It wasn't until her brows drew together that she spoke again. ]

You're hiding something from me. What can't you tell me?

[ A R G H ]

It's... something to do with the future. With your and Han's future, specifically. So it's... not my place to tell you about it.

[ Of course, the first thing to come to mind is that Han pulls one over her, he pulls a Kier. But that doesn't add up; as much as Han wouldn't want to get tangled in politics, he sticks it out with them in the fight against the Imperials. Why would Han have any reason to throw her under the ship? ]

I knew it. He goes behind my back.

[ ...and here is poor Luke. Poor Luke, who thinks Leia understands what he's trying to get at, and now is suffering from mental images he didn't need nor want. ]

I-I don't know how he does it!

[ The helpless, embarrassed squeaking is all that comes out in his voice. ]

I-it's something you need to talk to him about.

Why? So he can make excuses? No.

[ The shakiness in her grip on the comm was controlled by her fingers gripping all the harder. The shakiness in her voice, nothing could stop that. Which was why she breathed out the next bit unsteadily: ]

I can't believe I... [ A swallow cut her off. I can't believe I let myself believe. I can't believe I kissed him a second time, said those things. Let him in. ] I'm going to go now.

I didn't contact you to talk about-- this.

Edited 2017-10-22 03:22 (UTC)

Wha--? Leia, I'm sure it was mutual. Han wouldn't... do that.

[ ...this is a very real reminder that he actually isn't that good at this sort of thing. At all. ]

L-look, just trust me. The two of you need to talk.

...goodnight, Luke.

[ She wasn't so sure she wanted to do that. ]

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