Voicemail ~ Mask or Menace

[faithfulson]

Skywalker here. Leave a message, and I'll get back to you.

Comments

[faithfulson]

It felt that way when he left the first time.

So yes, I imagine it would.

[articulations]

[ She sighed and lowered her comm for a moment, fingers massaging over a brow. ]

I was better off not knowing. About the Force. About my connections to it. To you. To any family.

The less attachments the better.

[faithfulson]

Do you really mean that?

[articulations]

About attachments? Yes.

[ Leia didn't need to reach out to feel what he was feeling right now. She wasn't even fully sure what to make of this, of Ben leaving so unexpectedly. Of how she was feeling.

Had she been making progress with her son? Perhaps. They'd had their moment, as small as it had been. ]

Attachments are never good, Luke.

[faithfulson]

Now you're starting to sound like Master Yoda.

[ And Obi-Wan. And probably every Jedi except their father. ]

Being attached to another person isn't inherently a bad thing. Yes, it will hurt; it can tear you apart inside when something happens to that person. But we're human; to deny ourselves attachment to others is like denying ourselves. It's when that attachment turns to obsession that we need to worry.

[articulations]

Is that such a bad thing? Maybe Master Yoda was right.

I went so long not caring. I had the war to focus on, my mission. I gave my orders, I did my duty, everyone did theirs. There was no point to making friends when it came with such a heavy price.

If the porter can take anyone at any time then what's the point? I'd sooner deny myself the attachment than allow myself to be hurt.

[ Which, in turn, meant she would push everyone away. She would distance herself, gradually cut her ties before the Porter could do it for her. ]

[faithfulson]

Oh Leia.

There’s so much more to life than war and suffering. That’s why so many people fight; so if they can’t see the end, at least the people they loved and held dear could. Without the love that comes from attaching yourself to others, what is even the point of trying to make things better?

[articulations]

I've been apart of this war since I was sixteen. Fourteen if you include my involvement with politics through my father. I fight for those who can't. For those who don't have a voice. I don't fight for love. Or attachments.

Everyone I loved, they're already dead back home. If anything, I fight so their lives weren't lost for nothing. I fight for the hope that others so strongly believe in.

[faithfulson]

And what about the hope that you have, Leia?

[ There’s a pause between messages, like Luke isn’t certain he wants to dump this on her. ]

Why do you think you name him Ben?

[articulations]

[ She sighed, staring down at the first message. ]

The hope that I have? That I'm enough to fight for them. That the resources and men and women that I've gathered over the years who believe in the same hope that I do will be enough to win the war. To restore the Alliance.

Luke. Hope is like the sun. If you only believe in it when you can see it, you'll never make it through the night.

Too many times in this place, my belief, the hope I held, it's been. Broken. I'm stronger than that, I know. I just

[ There's only so much even someone like me can take. Her other thought was I'm only human.

The second message came through and Leia closed her eyes, turning her face away. ]

I can only guess.

[faithfulson]

I know you remember the message you left in Artoo. I know you know I always called Obi-Wan "Ben".

[ He certainly would never forget. “Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only hope.” ]

Your son is your hope, Leia. No matter where he is, what he does, or what he believes in, that will never change. By your own words, you don’t need to see him to know it’s true.

[articulations]

[ She felt the device vibrate in her hand, twice, with the incoming messages. Leia didn't want to look, didn't want to reply.

It was a mistake when she finally did. ]

What I want to say is difficult to put into words. How I feel is difficult to put into words.

There's a hollowness, Luke. There shouldn't be.

Text > Action

[faithfulson]

I know, Leia.

[ There’s a moment between the last buzz and the knock that comes from the door. Apparently someone had been on his way to see her anyway. ]

[articulations]

[ She should've felt his approach. Before he gave that knock, Leia should've known. If he didn't try to comfort her through the Force then he would do so in person. That was just the kind of character her brother was; compassionate, caring, family mattered. As it did, so much, to Anakin.

Leia moved to answer the door, not bothering with responding to his message. Without looking through the peephole, the lock was undone and the door opened. She said nothing, only looked at him, but before he could swoop in for a hug, a step back was taken to grant him silent permission to enter.

Conflict was one of the stronger emotions she felt, sadness, an indescribable ache that was a part of the hollowness she didn't know how to put into words, as she'd told him.

Had she cried? Yes, a little, briefly. Until the anger had crept in. Anger at the Porter, anger at this place, at herself. At Ben. ]

[faithfulson]

[ Luke was silent as he came in, regarding her wordlessly, but taking in how she was feeling more with his own eyes than his senses through the Force. After a long moment, he held his arms out for her, an invitation for her to hug him if she wanted. ]

[articulations]

[ Leia looked at the outstretched arms, knew what he was saying without actually saying it out loud. Did she want to hug him? Yes. Would it make her sad all over again? It would.

Still she said nothing. Only this time she was going to him, arms wrapping, face pressing to his shoulder, ]

[faithfulson]

[ Luke still didn't say a word; he didn't need to. He just wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her close to him and letting her do what she wanted. Cry, cling to him; it didn't matter. He was here for her. ]

[articulations]

[ She wanted to go home. That was what she wanted most right now. Being here, Leia was done with it. She and Han had briefly touched on the topic of people in possession of the ability to alter memories or completely erase them; there was temptation in that thought.

Her fingers curled in the back of his jacket. Only then did she register the chill from outside still coming off of him. Cry and cling, that wasn't what Leia did, as much as she wanted to somehow get rid of the burn of tears, eyes squeezing shut, pressing her face all the more into his shoulder.

The comfort he offered was appreciated, the warmth of the embrace both physically and mentally. She leaned into it, into him, and finally released a shaky breath that was muffled against him. ]